Holes in the Floor of Heaven
by StarryEyedChild
Summary: A fanfic to "Holes in the Floor of Heaven" by Colin Raye. It's a story told by Sakura's father, Fujitaka Kinomoto about his life and some of the pain that comes with it. It's mostly Fujitaka/Nadeschiko, but I threw a bit of Syaoran/Sakura in there as we


Disclaimer: No, I do not own CardCaptors or CardCaptor Sakura. -_-; It would be nice if I did though. Oh, and I don't own any of the characters either. Oh yeah, and I DID have html in here. Stupid computer didn't make it show up. Sorry. If anyone knows how to help me, please IM me or something.  
  
Author's Notes: This story is about Kinomoto Fujitaka, Sakura's father, and his life growing up. It's a songfic to "Holes in the Floor of Heaven" by Colin Raye. ^_^ Thanks and please review!  
  
  
  
Holes in the Floor of Heaven  
  
By Mistress9  
  
  
  
  
  
One day shy of eight years old  
  
My grandma passed away  
  
  
  
It was a warm, summer day in the city of Tokyo. I remember it so clearly. Tomorrow would be the day I had been looking forward to for months! There was hardly a spare moment when I didn't mention it to my parents. Yup, my birthday. I was finally going to be eight.  
  
My parents didn't really plan a big event. Just a small backyard party with some of my neighborhood friends. And best of all, it meant that my Grandma would be visiting from away. My grandma was always one of my favorite grown-ups. She was always sweet and caring, and not to mention she made the best chocolate chip cookies this side of the Pacific Ocean!  
  
So, there I was. A short little boy on my backyard swingset, merrily kicking my feet back and forth, just waiting for her car to pull into our driveway. I looked up just in time to see my mother leave the house and start to walk toward me. But something was different about her. Her face wasn't all smiles like it usually was, and her eyes were all puffy and bloodshot. Something was wrong.  
  
And something really was wrong. It turns out my grandmother had passed away that morning. That's why she was so sad. I couldn't believe it. My grandma... My favorite person in the whole world… was gone.  
  
  
  
I was a broken hearted little boy  
  
Blowing out that birthday cake  
  
  
  
And so, the big day came. But, it wasn't as special as I thought it would be. I didn't even want my birthday anymore. There wasn't anything to celebrate. Of course, my parents had been quite busy with calling our friends and family and informing them of the bad news, but they didn't want it to spoil my special day. So, the party went as scheduled.  
  
  
  
And how I cried when the sky let go  
  
With a cold and lonesome rain  
  
After all of the presents had been opened, the last slice of cake had been eaten and all of my friends had gone home, I sat alone on my swingset again. How I wished this day would just hurry up and end. But, more than that… I wanted my grandma back. I didn't know it, but at the time my mother had been watching me from the kitchen window. She pulled on her coat (as it seemed that it should start to rain at any moment) and walked outside to sit beside me on the swingset. And, just as she had suspected, it started to rain. She looked over at me with a kind smile.  
  
"I know how bad you feel about the past 2 days, honey, but you have to remember something."  
  
I looked over at her, without saying a word as the rain started to fall down my cheek.  
  
1 Mama smiled, said  
  
Don't be sad child  
  
Grandma's watching you today  
  
Cause there's holes in the floor of heaven  
  
And her tears are pouring down  
  
That's how you know she's watchin  
  
Wishing she could be here now  
  
And sometimes if you're lonely  
  
Just remember she can see  
  
There's holes in the floor of heaven  
  
And she's watchin over you and me  
  
"Grandma told me that when it rains, it means that someone who you have lost is looking down on us and wishing they were here. It's kind of like they're crying." She smiled again. "Good tears though. Kind of like tears of joy."  
  
I smiled a little bit and looked up at the sky.  
  
"So, Grandma can see me?" I asked.  
  
"In a way, yes." She said and took my hand. "Come on, let's go inside before you catch a cold."  
  
  
  
Seasons come and seasons go  
  
Nothin' stays the same  
  
I grew up, fell in love  
  
Met a girl who took my name  
  
  
  
Many years passed, and before I knew it, I was grown up. I was now married to a wonderful woman and had two children, Touya and Sakura. And so, for the first few years of our married life, everything was the way it was meant to be; perfect. Little did I know that I would soon hear the news that would turn my whole world upside-down forever…  
  
  
  
Year by year  
  
We made a life  
  
In this sleepy little town  
  
I thought we'd grow old together  
  
Lord I sure do miss her now  
  
  
  
Nadeschiko had passed away. I knew it was going to happen sooner or later, but there really is no way to prepare for the death of someone you love. She had been battiling cancer for the past year. The doctors had told us that the chances of her surviving were pretty slim. You see, when they finally discovered the cancer, it was far too late. It had alrady spread too far and even with treatment, she wouldn't last longer than a year or so.  
  
That night, I found myself in my study looking though photo albums of our wedding. My shoulders shook with sobs until I couldn't hold them back any longer. I rested my head on my desk and let a river of tears free. She was gone. She had finally left me. I stopped crying long enough hear the sound of a soft rain hitting the window. I looked over my shoulder and smiled a bit, remembering the words my mother had told me so many years ago.  
  
  
  
2 But there's holes in the floor of heaven  
  
And her tears are pouring down  
  
That's how I know she's watchin'  
  
Wishin she could be here now  
  
And sometimes when I'm lonely  
  
I remember she can see  
  
There's holes in the floor of heaven  
  
And she's watchin' over you and me  
  
Well my little girl's twenty-three  
  
I walk her down the aisle  
  
  
  
Well, I can't believe it. It's been years since I lost Nadeschiko. But in a way, she seemed to be with me through our daughter, Sakura. And… well, there really is no way to describe how I felt today. My baby girl… was getting married. So, there I was. Just staring at Sakura. God, she looked so much like Nadeschiko. It's hard to believe she's still the same cheerful little girl I used to see speeding down the road like greased lightning, late for school as usual. She looked like anything but a little girl on that day. It was weird seeing her in white.  
  
I've never been more proud of her either. She was a strong, independent person now. She doesn't need me. But, I know that I can trust my son-in- law, Syaoran Li, to be there for her. He's a good boy. I trust him. If only Touya felt the same…  
  
  
  
It's a shame her mom can't be here now  
  
To see her lovely smile  
  
They throw the rice, I catch her eye  
  
As the rain starts comin' down  
  
She takes my hand says  
  
"Daddy don't be sad,  
  
Cause I know Mama's watching now"  
  
There ceremony ends and I find myself standing outside the chapel doors, thanking guests for coming and getting many congratulations from friends and relatives. But, even though that day was supposed to be a day of joy and celebration, sadness hung over me like a rain cloud. Not just because of the fact that I had to let go of Sakura, but because Nadeschiko couldn't be here today either. God… I couldo nly imagine how proud she'd be of her. Probably just as much as I am. I guess we'll never know…  
  
Sakura walked up to me after she and Syaoran left the chapel and began to smile and hug her guests as well as receive congratulations. She never looked happier in her life. She turned around and caught my eye, obviously seeing the sadness in my face. I instantly plastered a smile on my face. Who was I to ruin her big day?  
  
"You're thinking about Mom, aren't you Dad?" She asks. Right to the point, totally out of character for her.  
  
I sighed as she took my hand. "You could say that. I just wish…Ijust wish that she could have been here today." I push a small strand of hair out of her eyes and smile. "She'd be very proud."  
  
A small raindrop lands on Sakura's nose. Neither of us could help smiling. We both knew what the other was thinking.  
  
"I don't think she's very far away, Dad."  
  
  
  
And there's holes in the floor of heaven  
  
And her tears are pourin' down  
  
That's how you know she watching  
  
Wishin' she could be here now  
  
And sometimes when I'm lonely  
  
I remember she can see  
  
Yes there's holes in the floor of heaven  
  
And she's watchin over you and me  
  
Watching over you and me  
  
Watching over you and me  
  
Watching over you and me 


End file.
